The real secrets of couples that lasts
Last Update : July 1, 2016
Some would argue that they maintain a sense of independence in their lives by not living together or not sharing a room with their loved one, while others speak of tolerance and compromise. In order for a relationship to last, you need two things: strong feelings for one another and the desire to maintain that love. There is no magic formula for love but certain attitudes towards your loved one will help to make your relationship stand the test of time. Finding love is one thing, but the real challenge is making it last. Turmoil, crisis, doubt, routine — your relationship will face many tests and hardships over time. This article is intended to provide some insight into remaining happy in your relationship despite the effects of passing time.
Trust each other when you’re apart
Almost all couples would agree: for a relationship to be a healthy one, both partners must be able to be independent. If one of you is gone and the other one is left feeling abandoned or jealous, it will not work and will eventually cause conflict. To be happy in your relationship, it’s important to strike a balance between time spent together and time spent apart.
From time to time, allow yourself to go out and spend time with friends and let your partner do the same. For this to work, you both have to be confident and trusting in one another. Having trust means allowing your partner the freedom to do the things they enjoy on their own. Take that time to enjoy your own things, too: take art classes, go to a dance club with your friends, etc. Your marriage should not get in the way of your personal growth.
Make compromises, not concessions
Everyone knows that a stable and serious relationship requires a lot of effort, which can be discouraging to singles looking for love. The most common misunderstanding, however, is confusing compromise with concession. It’s sometimes hard to find common ground in a long term relationship. It becomes entirely too easy to just go along with the other instead of striking a balance and making a compromise.
To always give in to your significant others wishes is a lot like abandoning your opinion or your wants and desires, whereas a compromise can work for the both of you. In the beginning of a relationship, it’s easy to want to make concessions out of love, without fully realizing the frustration it can create for the relationship in the future.
Share with each other & make plans
Dialogue is the key to the survival of almost any couple. Those who manage to share their doubts and fears can help each other and find a solution to any problem between them. Communication is essential in a relationship, though it may sometimes lead to an argument. Be delicate and open minded when discussing these issues.
Sharing and communicating with your partner also includes making plans together, whether it’s which restaurant to go to for dinner, where you’ll take your next vacation, or even long terms plans, like buying a house or having children. Making plans together allows couples to look forward and build a future together and avoid falling into a boring or monotonous routine.
Invest in the relationship
In order to keep the flame burning strong between you and your partner, you have to invest in the relationship. As the years pass, you may think that your love is something that just exists, but in reality, these feelings exist because they are maintained and nurtured. Both partners must put in the work and be attentive and considerate to one another.
The best ways to do this are sometimes the simplest: compliments, sweet talk, words of seduction, etc. The passion in the beginning stages of a relationship fades with time, but gives way to a much deeper love. Two people who were once passionately in love can become strangers, like ships in the night, if they do not pay attention to each other and fall into a routine. Never forget to show your partner love and affection, as it can go a long way.