Last Update : September 13, 2017
Say hello to the next person you meet, talking about rain and fine weather with shop assistants or exchange banalities with the newsagent. This is a good start, but it’s not enough to create lasting bonds of friendship. At first we talk about unimportant things. After a few weeks we may start to talk about what we did at the weekend. After a few months we invite our acquaintance for a drink and perhaps to share a barbecue: this is the time when the simple relationship becomes real friendship, the day that someone else invites you to enter their private sphere. Everything is done gradually and in order. Unlike romantic relationships that are sparked by the passion of the early days, the friendly relationships evolve in stages: from simple acquaintance to say hello to, to someone we look forward to seeing and then to a good friend, then finally from a friend to a very close friend that we cannot imagine being without.
It is not necessary to communicate on a regular basis with the type of person who gives you tips on how to choose your fabric softener. If you have not chosen to it review under natural circumstances, a friendly relationship has little chance of being born because of you in terms of friendship, it takes time and consistency.
Friendships are built over time. People build relationships by spending time together regularly. Friendship requires shared interests and recurring subjects of discussion. A friend takes time and nothing can accelerate the formation of a true if there are not more opportunities to spend time together.
The essence of friendship is the meeting of people who share common interests. This can be leisure interests such as painting, art or cooking, sport, music, shared political ideas or simply the love of partying. Therefore, the best advice that can be given to solitary person who is in need of social relations is to take part in group activities. Join a club, an association, a group sports team or even volunteer: it works! Why should someone do this? Because the fact of sharing common interests and experiences enriches the relationship, giving it a future and endless conversational topics to engage in. A relationship that begins on a sports field, for example, is more likely to become a true friendship than simply an exchange of friendly smiles with the baker…
These shared interests help us to have things in common with other people, but how do we go from this fragile relationship to a solid friendship? The answer is by creating experiences and a large number of lasting many memories. Friendship is nourished by memories and becomes enriched over the years. This is also why many friendships are formed while studying at university, where many individuals are virgins, as it can be found that friendly relations are easy at this time and can become more difficult later on.
There are several different types of situations where you can create a memorable experience: at a party (where you can get drunk together, casually, and become very close), playing sports (even suffering together, it works too) or through difficult trials (one colleague who divorces their partner and to whom you give your support, etc.). The relationship needs to evolve into friendship. We must nurture, cultivate and give our relationships the opportunities necessary for their development into true friendship.
To do this, try to pay attention to your knowledge of the other person as often as possible and anticipate the context that will allow your friendship to go further: to offer someone a drink, play sports (it is easier to motivate yourself with many other people), go on a picnic rather than going to the canteen, etc. In short, take the opportunity to suggest activities that you can enjoy together!